Chronicle of a journey from youthful Know-It-All to Old Fart astonishment.

At the end of the last post I promised to relate the adventures of the Hedge-Fund Manager who got way rich at the expense of the National Foreclosure Derby that's now playing in a town near you. Or on the block near you as in my case. Or, worst of all, maybe to you or yours. No joke at all if so. Then my first Grandson, Jayden Robert [above], was born and got home this afternoon. What can I say: "Things change?" Damn straight they change! Everything changes all the time by the way. Isaac Newton http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Isaac_Newton figured this out in 1687. The day Oprah's "bookers" called Dr. Phil was the day Phil figured out how to turn Newton's idea into big dough. I'm not that smart but neither was Isaac Newton. I'm just glad to be here to keep my promise about writing what I promised y'all I'd write. Anything else after this is pure Giblet Gravy.

Most of you have never heard of a Hedge-Fund Manager named John Paulson. A month ago, neither had I. Last tax-year, 2007, Paulson made over Four-Billion - with a "B" Dollars. This tax year, 2008, I'll bet he makes at least as much. Maybe more. Paulson became the 163rd richest American according to Fortune Magazine. Like 1970s sit-com The Jeffersons, Paulson's "Movin' On Up." Social mobility and Theme-Song aside, Loiuse and George Jefferson have as much in common with John Paulson as I have with Sir Isaac Newton. Only I'm better off than Sir Isaac: After Philosophica Principia Naturalis Mathmatica in 1647 he spent 40-years trying to turn Lead into Gold http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Philosophi%C3%A6_Naturalis_Principia_Mathematica. George Jefferson and Dr. Phil probably aren't that greedy but who knows.
Anyway you'd think Paulson would be one real happy guy by now. He's not. A little background here: Paulson's NOT the guy who's putting my neighbors and yours outta their houses! Just when your New Second Floor or Dream Kitchen or Wet Bar or Backyard Spa plus all the remodeling, rewiring, painting and Construction Permit misery has begun to fade into just another really hideously awful memory. Paulson's no sweetheart either.
Paulson couldn't care less whether you, me and the Sisters of the Poor are homeless. Trust a Shrink just this once [Since I've used the phrase before I promise not to write "Just This Once" again]. While President Irrelevant urged every American to "Take your families to Disney World!" Paulson, while a contributor to the re-election of the Free World's Leader began using Galileo's gravity principle whether or not Paulson realized it. Namely, what goes up must come down. A few years later after some
really furious King-Hell calculations, Paulson's Hedge-Fund began to bet that Federal Reserve Chairman Alan Greenspan's prime-interest rate cuts would end the Sub-Prime Mortgage Rate bubble. Like the same guy under a different President burst 'Dot-Com' dreams of yuppies who `KNEW Alan was Ronald Reagan's
"Shining City on the Hill" guy. So a speechwriter cribbed one of Reagan's memorable phrases
from John Winthrop, Puritan head honcho of the Massachusetts Bay Colony? BFD! So Winthrop most famous act was banishing Anne Hathaway forever as a Heretic Witch? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anne_Hutchinson. History's BIG fun!!

So why is John Paulson, the Four-Billion Dollars in 2007 Man, an unhappy guy? The money he got last year could pay the Boston Celtics Big Three's salaries outta petty cash. It's legal too! Enter A Matter Of [gasp!] HONOR. A WSJ story dated 1/15/2008 by Gregory Zuckerman indicates Paulson, a "previously little-known Hedge-Fund Manager got the biggest one
year pay in Wall Street history." But what's apparently stuck in Paulson's craw is he confided in a once-good friend by the name of Jeff Greene. According to Paulson, Greene an LA Real Estate hustler, up and made - ready for this? - $36-Billion [with a "B"] Dollars in 2007 AFTER PROMISING NOT TO USE PAULSON'S METHOD UNTIL PAULSON'S HEDGE-FUND WAS READY.
"He never said not to use it," smiled Greene to the WSJ. Their friendship is reportedly strained. Here's Paulson's story:

http://online.wsj.com/public/article/SB120036645057290423.html

Here's Greene's.

http://online.wsj.com/public/article/SB120036645057290423.html

And here's Greene's. Moral? You're on you're own.

>